Stephen Covey, one of the most influential personal development gurus has passed away due to complications from a prior cycling accident. His influential works, notably 7 Habits of Highly Effective People will ensure his legacy.
The Intelligence Paradox: Why the Intelligent Choice Isn’t Always the Smart One
This is interesting:
Intelligent people, however, have a tendency to overapply their analytical and logical reasoning abilities derived from their general intelligence incorrectly to such evolutionarily familiar domains and, as a result, get things wrong. In other words, liberals and other intelligent people lack common sense because their general intelligence overrides it. They think in situations where they are supposed to feel. In evolutionarily familiar domains such as interpersonal relationships, feeling usually leads to correct solutions whereas thinking does not.
Via: Business Insider
Source: The Intelligence Paradox: Why the Intelligent Choice Isn’t Always the Smart One
Points To Ponder
- Higher than the value of doing good and doing right is the value of having peace and harmony
- Quality of time is more important than quantity of time.
- Emotions are not right or wrong by themselves but the manifestation of these emotions can be right or wrong.
7 Habits of Highly Effective People
I attended a short one-day seminar of Franklin Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. It’s good stuff! Essentially, the 7 habits take us through 3 levels of the maturity continuum into becoming highly-effective people.
DEPENDENCE – We are born into this. Depending on others to take care of us. And often, blaming others for undesirable outcome of events.
Habit 1: Be Proactive – Take initiative in life by realizing that your decisions (and subsequent actions) are the primary determining factors for effectiveness in your life. Instead of simply reacting to stimulus, decide on your response to stimulus and take responsibility for your decision and its consequences.
Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind – Identify and clarify your values and life goals. Envision the ideal characteristics for each of your various roles and relationships in life.
Habit 3: Put First Things First – Plan, prioritize, and execute tasks based on importance rather than urgency. Evaluate whether your efforts are aligned with your values, propel you toward your life goals, and enrich your roles and relationships in life.
INDEPENDENCE – We mature into this. We take care of ourselves and make our own decisions. We accept responsibility for both undesirable and desirable outcomes.
Habit 4: Think Win-Win – Genuinely strive for mutually beneficial outcomes in your relationships. Value and respect people by understanding a “win” for all is ultimately a better long-term resolution than if only one person in the situation had gotten his way.
Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood – Use empathic listening to be genuinely influenced by a person, which compels them to reciprocate the listening and take an open mind to being influenced by you. This creates an atmosphere of caring, respect, and positive problem solving.
Habit 6: Synergize – Combine the strengths of people through positive teamwork to achieve things that are difficult of impossible to do alone. Get the best performance of people through encouraging meaningful contribution, and modeling inspirational and supportive leadership.
INTERDEPENDENCE – We work as a team to achieve things that are difficult or impossible to do alone. We all have important roles. Whether as leaders or followers, others depend on us and we, in turn, depend on them.
Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw – The story goes that a man was cutting wood with a saw and it was taking much time because the saw was blunt. Taking the time to sharpen the saw resulted in overall time savings. Just as a tool regular maintenance, we too require our own maintenance to rejuvenate our minds, bodies, and souls to create an effective, efficient, and sustainable lifestyle.
Fireproof
Today, I found myself again not knowing what to do. So I prayed for guidance and called my parents. We had a long talk about many things. I followed it up with research. Which somehow led me to the movie Fireproof. I remembered having it on my hard drive a long time ago. I checked and it’s still there! And so I watched.
It was uncanny, the similarity to my situation. You could change the names and certain details and it would be like it is about Michelle and me. There are many things to learn from the movie. But the top three for me are:
- Change begins with us. If we must wait for others to change before we do, then we can’t answer the question: When will they change? And maybe we never will. But if we take it upon ourselves to change, we can, we can do so now.
- Love is unconditional. We should not look for reciprocation. We should not stop loving because of rejection, or perceived rejection. The love of Jesus is for everyone, he gave his life for everyone, for those who accepts Him and those who rejects Him. So must we. I love Jeanne unconditionally but I was blind to the fact that I should love Michelle the same way.
- Marriage is a covenant. During the wedding, I vowed to be true to her in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. To love her and honor her all the days of my life. It is how God intended it to be. And by making my vow, I made a commitment to her and to God. As soon as I saw this, I put back my wedding ring on and I resolved that though I have stumbled, I will pick myself up and I will strive towards how He intends it to be.
Fireproof is highly-recommended watch for everyone. Through it, God provided me guidance. I’m sure it will do the same for others, too.